The only thing lamer than stealing someone’s car is stealing a car you can’t even drive. That is precisely what happened in this situation where some numbskull stole a high-end performance sportscar in the U.K. earlier this month. The knucklehead in question is a fella named Lee Smythe, and the sports car (supercar) in question is a Porsche 911 GTS. 

Stealing a Porsche 911 GTS is a really bad idea if you aren’t a great driver

Although Porsches are easy to chalk up to only being a fancy car for yuppie types, they are truly world-class race cars that, when spec’d properly, can be quite the handful for even many skilled drivers. 

Reporting from The Mirror doesn’t get too specific, but apparently, this particular Porsche 911 GTS had been set up for racing. This could mean a great many different things. Still, it most likely meant a harder, stiffer suspension, more dialed and aggressive tuning, and maybe even higher performance tires that require heat to actually work. Depending on how it was set up, this could be a tough car to drive indeed. 

So, what happened?  

CCTV road cameras caught Smythe behind the wheels of this 911 GTS heading south from Staffordshire to Birmingham. The police dashcam footage shows Smythe giving the Porsche the beans through the middle of town, which was fairly snowy/icy. 

The cops continued to chase when Smythe blasted a red light with no discernible care to its suggestion to stop. The cops kept the hot pursuit with Smythe and his passenger until (remember what I said about the tires) he lost control of the Porsche on a roundabout and spun out. 

One officer was recorded during the pursuit giving a play-by-play to dispatch, saying, “Speed increasing, we’re now five zero (50mph) as we approach a red light. He’s gone through a red… Onto the roundabout, he’s still struggling for traction, and down towards Highgate…We’ve approached a roundabout, oooh he’s had a big slide, this could be a crash.”

Apparently, you can use a stolen Porsche 911 as a ram

When another officer came in and tried to box in the stolen Porsche after the wipeout, Smythe rammed the cop cruiser. After a bit of back and forth, the police finally managed to force the Stolen Porsche 911 into the grass, where the game of cat and mouse ended.

To guarantee the event was going to end there, one of the officers lept from his cruiser, smashed the Porsche’s driver window, and gave Smythe the business end of his taser.  

The Porsche thief didn’t even put up a fight

According to Mirror, Smythe admitted to the alleged crimes of aggravated vehicle taking, dangerous driving, failing to stop for police. He was also charged with possession of a “firearm” for having a can of mace in the car with him. Smythe, who had previously been convicted 21 times, was sentenced to 16 months in the big house and nearly four years without a license.