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Close-up of Tesla Motors logo against a bright blue sky in Pleasanton, California, July 23, 2018.

The New Tesla Update Turns Its Cars Into the Class Clown – It Literally Makes Fart Noises

Tesla has always been about standing out. Elon Musk, owner and founder of the EV company, has never been shy about his eccentricities. For example, he shot one of his cars into space with a manakin in the driver’s seat. He put gullwing doors on an SUV. The fastest of his cars’ name is a …

Tesla has always been about standing out. Elon Musk, owner and founder of the EV company, has never been shy about his eccentricities. For example, he shot one of his cars into space with a manakin in the driver’s seat. He put gullwing doors on an SUV. The fastest of his cars’ name is a Spaceballs reference. As if he anywho thought Tesla needed to be any more attention-grabbing, the new Telsa Holiday firmware update does just that. 

Tesla gave owners an adolescent Christmas gift this year

Tesla dropped the new firmware update 2020.48.25 on Christmas day as if it came from the big guy himself. Like many things from Tesla, the update is both a practical redesign of the infotainment system user interface and a little bit of childlike fun mixed in. According to Car and Driver, the interface’s new look devotes more of the screen to driving visualization display. Many believe this is a step to support Full-Self Driving (FSD) once it’s ready for the market.

Not to miss an opportunity for some fun, the Tesla update added some stuff to Santa Mode. This shows your car on the screen as the big guy in red’s sleigh and any surrounding cars as reindeer. The update also includes new games on the main screen like Solitare to help passengers pass the time. 

Boombox mode will be fun for you but mind-numbingly annoying for your neighbors

The most Telsa-y aspect of the new update is the Boombox mode. This feature is only possible for newer models with external speakers. With Boombox mode activated, you can change the sound of your car’s horn. That’s right, no more standard “beep” that gets lost in the sea of anonymous horn blasts. No, this will allow getting someone’s attention with the sound of a goat, applause, “La Cucaracha,” and lastly, a good ol’ fart noise. Boombox mode will also allow for custom sounds of your choosing to be uploaded via USB. Before your dreams run away with you, the only way the car will make these noises is if it is parked. I know, I, too, wanted to send an aggressive fart to the guy going to slow, alas. 

The new Tesla update offers more that just some passing gas

This part will undoubtedly become an extreme nuisance, but it does sound fun. The new system will allow not only the farty horn but also you can now play whatever music is playing inside the cars out loud through the external speakers. You can change the sound remotely using the Summon feature. The “Boombox” title is starting to make a lot more sense. For those young folks who never had a boombox, this is like a giant version of your phone, except it doesn’t take photos of food, send twitters, texts, snaps, or any other kind of digital nonsense, oh and it can’t make phone calls. Music. It just plays music. 

Tesla is giving us something shiny to distract from the lack of FSD

Elon Musk had stated that Tesla’s FSD program would be operational by the end of the year. As we know now, that is not the case. The year’s end is here, and there is no Full-Self Driving Tesla. Even though the FSD system isn’t available yet, it is in a closed Beta test being used by some. We also know that the update to the interface is meant to support this feature when it comes.

Even though this fun new audio and interface system is free, FSD will be far from free. It was originally supposed to be an $8,000 subscription that has since been raised to $10,000 smackers to have your car drive for you. Well, if this is Elon’s way of dealing with broken promises, I’ll gladly see more of his lofty goals go unmet. 

Just be prepared when you are walking around with your date and loud, semi-mechanical fart blasts from what seems like the either. Fear not; it’s just Elon.

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